Recovery Is Not One Size Fits All: Honoring Individual Paths to Healing

I am blessed to have achieved 11 years sobriety.  The road wasn't always easy; I lost both my parents in early sobriety but my friends in AA supported me.

What is sobriety?  I asked ChatGPT for a definition and it gave me a really thorough, good one:

Sobriety is the state of being free from the influence of alcohol or drugs, marked by clear thinking, self-control, and sound judgment.

More broadly, sobriety can also mean:

• A lifestyle choice of abstaining from alcohol or other substances, often as part of recovery or personal growth

• Mental and emotional clarity, where one is present, aware, and able to respond thoughtfully rather than impulsively

• Steadiness and balance, reflecting moderation, discipline, and intentional living

In recovery contexts, sobriety often refers not only to avoiding substances, but also to pursuing healing, accountability, and a healthier way of life—one day at a time.

Before I went to AA 11 years ago, I was "dry" for a period of time which means I simply did not drink alcohol.  When I got into AA & began working the 12 steps, that is when I learned the difference between being "dry" and being "sober."

Prior to the 2020 pandemic, I went to AA meetings three times a week.  I also got together regularly with people I met in the AA fellowship.  The pandemic turned the world upside down.  For me, the "upside down" was a good thing; not that everyone agrees.  Being forced to slow down with activities being canceled made me realize how exhausted I was always being on the go.  Before the pandemic, I was extremely involved with our local Catholic church.  If someone told me to jump, I was asking "how high?"  I exhausted and burned out.

In 2021 when activities resumed, I did not want to the same things I'd done before the pandemic or nearly as much. After my son graduated from high school, I joined Steadfast and started Crossfit. I quickly found another supportive community.  My "new normal" became Crossfit classes 3-4 times a week and AA once a week during the time I previously had gone to mass.

There was grumbling from a variety of sources about my choices but I found I was much happier with my new routine.  Although I was only going to one meeting a week, I continued to do AA service work.

In the fall of 2023, I was asked to give a lead (speech) at what was my AA home group at that time.  Unlike business presentations where you have a slide deck and presentation that you've rehearsed, your only preparation for a lead is to ask God to guide your words. I asked God's guidance when I walked up to the podium. Apparently, it was "God's Will" for me to speak that day about how grateful I am for the Steadfast family and how much I enjoy Crossfit.  The grumbling after that lead became louder - my priorities were wrong and I should be going to AA meetings instead of Crossfit.  I tried giving up one Crossfit class a week to pick up an extra meeting but, honestly, I was miserable. 

If I had not gotten sober through AA, I would have never made it to Steadfast to try Crossfit.  I cannot and will not forget what AA has done in my life.  After a lot of prayer, I sought out a different Sunday morning meeting. I'm blessed to have found a group of women who support and accept me for who I am - a sober woman who enjoys Crossfit and powerlifting.

I want folks to understand that recovery is not "One Size Fits All" because we are all different.  

• I'm an empty-nester who works a full-time job, does Crossfit 3-4 times a week (after a year of powerlifting), recently found kayaking & hiking, and holds a service position with a women's AA group.
• Someone else might have lost a job as a result of their addiction and finds daily AA meetings valuable as they focus on their recovery.
• Another person might seek out a recovery program that is not AA. I am not familiar with these but I link to options under Resources.
• Yet another person might opt to work closely with a therapist.

If you are in recovery from alcohol and/or drug addiction, know that I support you regardless of how live out your sobriety. My hope is that you are surrounded by a supportive community and staying sober "one day at a time."

Resources:

ChatGPT - Sobriety Definition in italics plus SEO optimization.

Non 12-Step Support Groups (not AA)

Scripture Image - YouVersion Bible App